12 February 2009

Homesick

I haven't lived at home for seven years. In all that time, I have never really gotten homesick for our house, yet tonight it is what keeps me awake. My parents just sold the house I grew up in, and though it is a great blessing for them, I can't help but to be a little heartbroken.

I can never go home again. I will no longer have a space in the driveway for my car, nor will I ever see my dad pushing a lawnmower around our yard again. The days of racing my brother up the stairs are over. There will be no more bonfires out back or late night pool dips.

Memories from that house are flooding in. Like the time we tried to cram our oversized Christmas tree through the front doors. Or when we piled on my parents' bed to watch TV and got the 11pm sillies. There was stretching under the table after Sunday dinners and doing back handsprings on the flat part of the roof. And I will never forget being awakened every morning from from my mom's voice on the intercom system, shouting, "Lindsey, get up! This is reeeeee-diculous."


Anyone who no longer has a place to call "home" has probably felt these sentiments. While I now have my own family, home, and new memories, there is still a pit in my stomach when I realize how much farther I am moving away from my childhood. Change is inevitable and yet I still want to cling so hard to what I cannot control.

So, I am allowing myself to be sad tonight. Even though it is only a house, I'm sad that I didn't get to say goodbye. I wish I could be there to help pack years and years of memories. Thank you to all of those back home that have spent hours helping my parents pack and move. 

The memories from within my old house are so vivid. It's as if they just occurred yesterday. 





Goodbye, house, I'll miss you.


3 comments:

  1. Geez, you made ME teary-eyed, and it's not even my house! It would be really hard to not have a home to come back to, especially when you live all the way across the country! I just realized in reading your post that I bet poor Jorden is having similar thoughts being away on his mission. It will be hard for him to. I don't know though, I think it might have been harder for both of you to see it packed up and empty. Maybe better that you weren't there...

    On a brighter note, the happy memories you have of growing up there will be with you forever. No one can take those away!

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  2. Aww, I think pretty much everyone in our entire senior class will miss the Nash household! I mean, we did so much stuff there...dinners for Twirp and cheerleading and parties and sleepovers. *SIGH. So many memories, now you're making me all nostalgic!

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  3. wow--that's crazy that your parents sold their house. did they move away from GR completely?

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